There are various estimates on how much of our communication is verbal and how much is non – verbal. In any case, body language is very important in all aspects of our lives to getting your true message across and interpreting the message of others. Here is a beginner’s guide.

These are very general, and in many cases, do not apply. Posture is often affected by physical issues, fatigue, an injury etc.

Understand the meanings of looking.

  • When you look strangers in the eye, you are saying, “I want to know more about you.”
  • When you stare at strangers in the eye without a smile, it can be interpreted as antagonism.
  • When you look people in the mouth, you are saying, “I am not comfortable looking into your eyes” or “I want to kiss you.”
  • When your eyes are locked onto a specific part of a person’s face you are saying, “I am nervous.”
  • When you look away from a person routinely or lean away from them, you are saying, “I don’t like you.” This also goes for being made uncomfortable by the person, or shyness.
  • When you raise one eyebrow, you are saying, “oh really?”
  • When you roll your eyes upwards, you are saying, “I am imagining”
  • When you close your eyes halfway, you are saying, “I am suspicious.”
  • When you look down, you are saying, “I’m thinking.”
  • When you widen your eyes, you are saying, “I am amazed.”

Express yourself through facial features.

  • When you wink you are saying, “It’s our little secret.”
  • When you smile subtly, you are saying, “Here is a gesture of approval.”
  • When you smile with teeth and close your eyes a bit, you are saying, “I am very happy.”
  • When you walk constantly looking at the ground, you are feeling unconfident.
  • When you frown, you are saying, “I am bored/unhappy.”
  • When you drop your jaw, you are saying, “I don’t believe it.”
  • When you bite your bottom lip while gazing at a person, you are saying, “I’m flirty.”
  • When you bite your bottom lip, you are saying, “I’m nervous” or “I’m uncomfortable”.

Move your head.

  • When your head is up, you are saying, “I don’t mind people looking at me.”
  • When your head is down, you are saying, “I don’t want people to look at me.”
  • When you turn your head to look at someone, you are saying, “I enjoy looking at you.”

Understand meanings of the placement of legs.

  • When you hold your legs close together, you are saying, “I am modest.”
  • When you hold your legs far apart, you are saying, “I am not modest.”

Placing your shoulders.

  • When your shoulders are open and wide, you are saying, “I would like to meet new people.”
  • When your shoulders are closed and hunched, and the expression unhappy, you are saying, “Leave me alone, please.”

Understand the meanings of physical contact.

  • When you touch someone on the arm, you are saying, “I want us to be close.”
  • When you touch someone on the waist/neck/face, you are saying, “I am physically attracted to you.”

Understand the general condition.

  • When you are tense, you are saying, “I am not comfortable.”
  • When you are relaxed, you are saying, “I am comfortable.”
  • When you fidget, you are saying, “I want to find something better to do.”

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